what do you think about a psychiatrist who needs to make lots of jokes and tell lots of anecdotes?
March 30th, 2009 | by admin |
pseudonymn asked:
where i am, insurance only pays for 30 minutes and doc is not open to 1 h every 2 weeks. for me, talking 30 minutes makes it hard to get to something important, deep. all the more so in that the psy tends to keep making jokes or telling anecdotes, not tons, but systematically. a little tidbit or two every session. example: i’m nourished by nature, but due to my work, finances and singleness it’s hard for me to be llive out of the city and it’s hard for me to feel well thus. he quotes some writer, with humor about how they should move cities to the country. at one of first sessions after answering questions about family, at end he told some totally unconnected anecdote about someone who invested in wine where i used to live and drank it all. he’s 15 years older than me, so i’m thinking that perhaps there’s a risk that he’s unconsiously putting in a little charm factor—not sure if it’s worth continuing. feels somewhat superficial and when i get slightly deep, out comes a joke.
last session i tried to offer the suggestion of an hour every 2 weeks to get a sense of deeper work but he said it didn’t work with his schedule; so i feel like i’m gonna be tagged as complainer if i bring up an issue for second consecutive week. not sure that it’s doing much good. a bit of chest getting off of but not so deep.
don’t think he’s trying to hit on me, but think it could be unconscious charming, human as we all are. that’s just the way life is.
loosening meaning joking around not so useful, i do that all the time in regular life, don’t need to see a psy to joke around. need depth.
i hesitate to change because i’m living in a foreign country where they tend to be much more old style and he’s not that bad. i think he is just being himself; if we had an hour i might be ok w the joking but with 30 minutes it’s a bit tough to get deep if we go for the jokes whenever it gets serious.
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where i am, insurance only pays for 30 minutes and doc is not open to 1 h every 2 weeks. for me, talking 30 minutes makes it hard to get to something important, deep. all the more so in that the psy tends to keep making jokes or telling anecdotes, not tons, but systematically. a little tidbit or two every session. example: i’m nourished by nature, but due to my work, finances and singleness it’s hard for me to be llive out of the city and it’s hard for me to feel well thus. he quotes some writer, with humor about how they should move cities to the country. at one of first sessions after answering questions about family, at end he told some totally unconnected anecdote about someone who invested in wine where i used to live and drank it all. he’s 15 years older than me, so i’m thinking that perhaps there’s a risk that he’s unconsiously putting in a little charm factor—not sure if it’s worth continuing. feels somewhat superficial and when i get slightly deep, out comes a joke.
last session i tried to offer the suggestion of an hour every 2 weeks to get a sense of deeper work but he said it didn’t work with his schedule; so i feel like i’m gonna be tagged as complainer if i bring up an issue for second consecutive week. not sure that it’s doing much good. a bit of chest getting off of but not so deep.
don’t think he’s trying to hit on me, but think it could be unconscious charming, human as we all are. that’s just the way life is.
loosening meaning joking around not so useful, i do that all the time in regular life, don’t need to see a psy to joke around. need depth.
i hesitate to change because i’m living in a foreign country where they tend to be much more old style and he’s not that bad. i think he is just being himself; if we had an hour i might be ok w the joking but with 30 minutes it’s a bit tough to get deep if we go for the jokes whenever it gets serious.
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6 Responses to “what do you think about a psychiatrist who needs to make lots of jokes and tell lots of anecdotes?”
By kessie on Apr 2, 2009 | Reply
tell him what you’ve told us.
By nyskiermom on Apr 4, 2009 | Reply
I think he’s trying to build rapport with you, but not doing a great job. At least he sounds like a nice guy.
By lil-owie on Apr 7, 2009 | Reply
Maybe he’s trying to get you to “loosen up”by not being to serious,or he’s getting ready to “hit”on you?
By km76 on Apr 9, 2009 | Reply
If for any reason you feel that your therapy isn’t going well, then I would suggest you try to find someone else to talk to. I would suggest this especially if you have been seeing him for over 5 sessions or so and you continue to feel that work is not being done.
All counselors have their own techniques, therefore you will not mesh well with every and any counselor. I have been trained to act like myself during my counseling sessions with clients because clients can see a phony 100 miles away. So, perhaps your counselor generally uses a lot of joking and odd anecdotes, it’s who he is. That doesn’t mean you’re obligated to like him or work well with him in a therapeutic relationship.
Good luck to you.
Your counselor is very lucky to have such a self aware client! 
By Lynne B on Apr 10, 2009 | Reply
Jokes are a cover up. He is resistant to getting down to do the work that needs to be done. You are ready to get down to it. Find someone who is in alignment with your goals. You might be able to negotiate with the next therapist & ask that whatever they charge you that they just give you a free 30 minutes. You be determined you are going to get the best & you will. I can not imagine in anyway this man is ever going to do anything but disrespect you. Respect yourself. Write down what your idea person would be like. Efficient, repspectful, powerful effective, compassionate, a good listener. wise. You focus on what you want & let the clown go…My brother tells me I do for him what his psychiatrist hasn’t done in 20 years. He goes to the Dr. for his pills but I give him the inspiration & stability to focus on what he needs to do to make the changes that make his life better.
By robink71668 on Apr 11, 2009 | Reply
Sounds very unprofessional to me.